Friday, November 24, 2006

Friday Cat Blogging

Today on NatGeo, we see a fight to the death between a cat (Felis domesticus) and a predatory toothbrush (Dentis sparklingus). Note the innocuous approach of the toothbrush towards the cat. Playing the bristly, standoffish oral hygiene aide is the toothbruth's ploy to lure its prey.

The cat, falling for this false sense of security, picks up the toothbrush and she is allured by the minty scent of it's prickly fur... yet another facet that the toothbrush uses to draw in its next meal. Still though, even at this late stage, the toothbrush feigns inaction.

The cat, thinking she has found incredible luck to have an edible, minty thing within fall blithely within her grasp, foolishly, and fatally, brings the toothbrush close to her own mouth for her first bite. Upon sensing the dental decay closing in around it, the toothbrush acts.

Quickly, the toothbrush springs to life, and rapidly dominates its hapless prey. The cat, taken clearly by surprise, rears back, but the toothbrush is already doing it's job, attacking plaque and fish breath mercilessly. The cat's teeth cannot withstand the onslaught.

The cat is on her back, using the last of her energy to try to pry the carnivorous toothbrush from her jaws, but it is too late. The minty fresh scent that the cat had found so appealing earlier is now an overpowering odor, filling the cat's senses as she slips into darkness.

The cat, now conquered by the smaller, yet stronger toothbrush (whose regular diet of flouride-rich Crest makes it healthy and powerful), lies still, eyes glazing over, as the toothbrush completes its final work of the hunt, gorging itself on leftover bug bits from between teeth.

And, finally we witness what is one of the stranger habits of the wild carnivorous toothbrush: After killing its prey, the wild toothbrush will lie next to the carcass of it's most recent meal, and keep itself warm in the fading body heat of the recently deceased.

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