Chrome Pole Report

Coyotee Gogo had a dance contest last night.

I compare all dance contests to the first dance contest I ever went to: A Nanapong contest at Electric Blue between the 5 prettiest girls from each of 2 Bangkok gogo bars and each of 2 Pattaya gogo bars. There was no mistaking it was a special event with much fanfare, and a heightened level of excitement and intensity among both the dancers and the crowd.

The performance of the girls was over the top and frenzied, each girl vying for the judges attention, and doing their best to titillate, excite, and even shock the crowd. It wasn't just the suggestion of sex, or even the simulated act. Everything from fingers and beer bottles to sausages from the buffet table found their way into the act... and into the girls.

In other words, there was no mistaking this for an ordinary night of gogo dancing.

Such was not the case with recent dance contests I have been to... both at Diamond A Gogo and last night's contest at Coyotee. I won't say it wasn't enjoyable — because it was, as all nights out in Pattaya's gogo bars tend to be. However, words like "special", "amazing", and "off-the-wall" are words that, for me, conjure up images of dissappearing sausages, not the Pattaya standard of beautiful naked girls dancing on a stage.

The girls are principally to blame. For them, it was business as usual: Get up on stage, strip, and gossip with each other in between smiling blankly off into the distance while masturbating the chrome pole and assuming the supposedly erotic positions that they have mechanically assumed thousands of times before.

I think that the worst part was a complete lack of personality among the majority of the girls. After having, just the night previous, seen ladyboy beauty queens proudly and gracefully work the stage... the sight of congenitally meek Thai girls gallumping onto the stage, shoulders hunched foward, hair hanging down to obscure everything but the tip of their nose and the centermost aspect of an ashamed smile when their name was announced was an exercise in extremes.

After this initial introduction of the contestants, the evening proceeded just as every other evening of gogo dancing proceeds... albeit with higher turnover of girls on the stage. Groups of 4 dancers would come up, one song would play with the girls fully bikinied, and then another song would play with the girls fully nude. There was no increased sense of duty to excite the crowd among the dancers, and no increased sense of duty among the crowd to encourage them to do so.

Coyotee has quite a number of beautiful girls, and having them up on stage naked is a treat. But the fact remains that they are up on stage naked every night of the week. The dance contest did nothing to improve on every other night in the bar.

Now, I will admit, I left early... about halfway through the first round. Perhaps, as the evening wore on, and the number of girls was whittled down to a few final contestants, a sense of purpose may have emerged from the humdrum that I saw. If it did, then obviously what I write here is only true for the time that I was there.

Also, I like the premise that a dance contest is about bars, not girls. I would love to see Coyotee girls go up against girls from Diamond, Living Dolls Showcase, and Misty's. That would be a competition. Having only one bar presenting its girls, and having judges pick the prettiest/sexiest girl from that population... well, once again, that is a function that every man performs every night when he goes into a gogo bar: Pick the prettiest and take home the winner.

So, all in all, a fun evening... just like every other.