Swearing in Thai

I've been having a correspondence with Steve Rosse about swearing and insulting in Thailand... not because I have any deep desire to engage in such behavior, but because Thai people constantly behave this way towards Farangs (while smiling and wai'ing and being nice), and we Farangs don't realize it 99% of the time.

One of the things which I have heard a lot of, and never recognized as a swear word because it was used all the time in Brazil, where I also lived, was "Ai"... as in "Ai Jil!" In Brazil, that means, "Oh Jil!" In Thailand, it means "Fucker Jil". (The proper response to this, if it is a girl, is "Eee Pui!" (although she has never said this to me), which is the female equivalent of "Ai".)

If somebody, when toasting with drinks, clicks the bottom of their glass down on the rim of yours, you should immediately punch him (or her) square in the nose. Don't worry... nobody will blame you. A bar girl helping herself to your cigarettes without asking is pretty much just as bad.

And if you ever hear a sentence end with "wa" instead of the polite "kha" or "khrap", you have also just been insulted. If somebody exclaims "Ai wa!" to you, well... that's doubly bad.

The ultimate has to do with "you". In Thai, there are about 8 or 9 different versions of "you" depending on whom you are talking to, such as the king, monk, government official, old lady, girlfriend... or slave. The worst way somebody can insult you is to use "mung" instead of the standard "you" word, "khun".

Well, this is just a sampling of what Steve has told me so far. Hopefully he will be sending me more tidbits about how to recognize the impolite Thais that every Farang here runs into every day... but rarely realizes it.