Troll: From the fishing term. As a noun, synonymous with flamebait. As a verb, to post controversial or provocative messages in a deliberate attempt to provoke flames.
People in the blogosphere seem to dislike trolls. As an author of a blog, I love trolls more than anyone else who visits my blog (except you, Mom).
For me, it is the ultimate confirmation of my writing. After all, I don't spend too much time on politics or other such issues which are prone to trolls posting comments. Therefore, if somebody comes to my website, and is incensed enough by the details of my life (and the way I write about them) to go and put up vulgar comments. Well, a writer can have no greater power over another person than that.
Seriously: It's easy for you to write something on your blog that makes people say, "Oh how wonderful! You put that so well!" It's easy to send people away some kind of warm fuzzy feeling after having read a blog. What is truly considered an accomplishment though, is to totally (and without cheating by going into the subject matter of "I Love Nazis" or "Let's Have Lynch Sometime" which naturally provoke anger among readers) manipulate someone with your writing to the point where their blood boils and they post insults in your comments section.
However even that isn't the top of the writing success ladder. The ultimate domination over a reader is when that person becomes so angry about what you have written that they come back after their initial first visit so that they can be angered by you again. They come to you for their daily Two Minutes of Hate.
When you get that kind of reader, you can be rest assured that you have hit the top. You actually own somebody's ability to be angry. Like the submissive begs for pain from the dominant, the troll begs for his anger from you.
So, if you are reading this, and you have visited my website before so that I could make you angry, I personally thank you... and please be sure to thank me in kind by putting up ribald comments to show everyone else how great I am.
Oh... and please don't use the "anonymous" user name, because if more than one troll comes to my site, and if I'm actually good enough to attract multiple trolls, I would like everyone to know it (especially my mother), so please use a unique username. I've checked, and "JilSucksAss" and "IHateJil" are both available.
(Oh... and if you actually like my blog, but feel that this post is a request for you to pretend you are a troll, please don't. I only like real trolls. Insulting me without being serious about it is just condescending.)
3 comments:
I think you need to re-evaluate your horrible treatment of innocent kittens, such as the recent post where you FORCED some cute kitten to place her paw over a mouse on your computer. Shameful! Worse than Kitty Pron, this is Kitty Slavery, and you must be condemned in the strongest possible language. I intend to report you to the SPCA, who will hopefully bust in your door and nail your corpse to some sleezy bar on Running Street, or whatever you call that collection of hore houses and drug dens.
You have been warned!
Yours, in love,
FriskoDude
Nope. I never stage my kitty pron. It's all 100% spontaneous. My cats' cute quotient yields about a dozen photo ops per day, and I pick the best from about 50 photos to put up on the site.
No, you force you innocent cats to participate in your evil ways, not unlike Gary Glitter down there in the cesspool that in Vung Tao, taking showers with girls shorter than his waist, not unlike kitty abusers in Pattaya who can't own up to their deviant behavior. The fat guy at PM is all over this, so expect a knock in the middle of the night.
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